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A bloke came up to me at the poetry club. He said "Iambic Pentameter."

I said "Nice to meet you Bic..."

Why don't anarchists like earl grey?

Because all proper tea is theft.

The film about Margaret Thatcher "The Iron Lady" has been given a 12A certificate.

Apparently it's not suitable for miners.

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stevie wonder was playing a concert in Japan. halfway through, someone shouts up at him "play a jazz chord!!"

stevie hears this and glad that someone is aware of his extensive repertoire, fires into a couple of jazz numbers. at the end of these, the voice shouts up again "play a jazz chord!!"

stevie again hears this and blasts into some improv. jazz pieces and plays them with all his heart. at the end of these, the voice shouts up one more time "play a jazz chord!!!"

stevie, frustrated, yells "look man, i've played all the jazz i know!! what song do you want me to play?"

the man says "A JAZZ CHORD!"

stevie says "i'm sorry, i don't know that one, cat. sing some of it and i might be able to pick it up....."

with that the man starts singing.........

"I jazz say............i wove you!!"
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