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............ and I said: "I love you".
She said; "Is that you or the beer talking?"
















I replied: "It's me talking to the beer".
 

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In the interests of equality:

A man is sitting in the lounge when he hears his wife say "Would you like chicken or lamb for your dinner today love?"
"Thanks very much," he says "I'll have chicken."
"**** off, I was talking to the cat," she replies "You're having soup."
 
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