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Discussion Starter #1
This morning we woken at 3 am to hear our cockerel Elvis crowing for a solid hour, then again at 6 am until 7am. :mad:

Not any more.


He is now ready for dinner!:D

And I did it by myself! (Mr S did the culling part though)

I have plucked and gutted him ( Wish I had fed him up a bit though)

We were thinking of selling him anyway but cockerels only make 50p at auction.


I am so proud of myself :D
 

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Hmmm that gives me an idea about that chap who is noisy when he leaves for work at 5am:cheese:

Congratulations on killing your pet by the way:thumbs:
 

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Discussion Starter #4
Your so evil but at least you wont have anymore sleepless nights due to that ****! :lol:

I am evil, just wont tell the kids until they have eaten it. Its the neighbours I did it for really!

Hmmm that gives me an idea about that chap who is noisy when he leaves for work at 5am:cheese:

Congratulations on killing your pet by the way:thumbs:
I did warn Mr S that would happen to him if he woke me up at 3am too!!

Luckily i didn't think of him as my pet at the time!!
 
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Nowt wrong with eating fresh meat the way it
was intended to be eaten. :D :thumbs:


No jokes about ***** please. :tut:
 

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Well done. Do you think you could come and do the same with my neighbour?
 
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I think I could do it :evil:, but not once I had named something :eek: :lol:

Reminds me of 'pinchy' the lobster in the Simpsons :cheese:
 

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:thumbs: Nice one SA.

When I lived in a village in Cyprus the ***** crowing used to drive me mad, they even did it in the pitch dark too. Perhaps explains why I drunk copious amounts of the local brandy !:D

Hope you enjoy him !

Doh, fallen fowl [ sic ] of the swear filter, this is crazy.
 

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Listen carefully tonight, what's that you hear? In the distance? It's getting louder, louder still, it isn't? It is! a crowing cockrel outside your bedroom window, now scratching, the SCRATCHING MAKE IT STOP, HE'S COME BACK AND HE WANTS REVENGE GOOOOD HEEELP UUUSSS

Sleep tight.
Corbo.
 

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Discussion Starter #13
Listen carefully tonight, what's that you hear? In the distance? It's getting louder, louder still, it isn't? It is! a crowing cockrel outside your bedroom window, now scratching, the SCRATCHING MAKE IT STOP, HE'S COME BACK AND HE WANTS REVENGE GOOOOD HEEELP UUUSSS

Sleep tight.
Corbo.
I shall be sleeping soundly thanks!!
 

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Discussion Starter #15
:thumbs: Nice one SA.

When I lived in a village in Cyprus the ***** crowing used to drive me mad, they even did it in the pitch dark too. Perhaps explains why I drunk copious amounts of the local brandy !:D

Hope you enjoy him !

Doh, fallen fowl [ sic ] of the swear filter, this is crazy.


Cheers!!

He used to crow all day too, I know its what they are supposed to do but 3am??
 

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A farmer went out one day and bought a brand new stud cockerel for his chicken coop. The new cockerel struts over to the old cockerel and says, "OK old fart, time for you to retire." The old cockerel replies, "Come on, surely you cannot handle ALL of these chickens. Look what it has done to me. Can't you just let me have the two old hens over in the corner? " The young cockerel says, "Beat it: You are washed up and I am taking over." The old cockerel says, "I tell you what, young stud. I will race you around the farmhouse. Whoever wins gets the exclusive domain over the entire chicken coop." The young cockerel laughs. "You know you don't stand a chance, old man. So, just to be fair, I will give you a head start." The old cockerel takes off running. About 15 seconds later the young cockerel takes off running after him. They round the front porch of the farmhouse and the young cockerel has closed the gap. He is only about 5 feet behind the old cockerel and gaining fast.

The farmer, meanwhile, is sitting in his usual spot on the front porch when he sees the cockerels running by. He grabs his shotgun and - BOOM - he blows the young cockerel to bits. The farmer sadly shakes his head and says, "Darn.....third gay cockerel I bought this month."

Moral of this story? ... Don't mess with the OLD FARTS - age, skill and treachery will always overcome youth and arrogance!
 

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A farmer needs a new cockerel for his chickens. He goes to the bazaar and finds a really horny one.

As soon he gets back, he realeases the cockerel into the coop and he starts working on chickens with all feathers flying ,cluckings etc.

The cockerel seems extrelemy horny and he is always on a chicken. the farmer starts to get worried about the cockerel incase something will happen to him.

And a week later, when the farmer comes back to the coop, he sees the cockerel is laying on his back, his legs are up and his tongue is sticking out and a vulture is circling above!!

The farmer starts to grumble ' I knew it was coming, i wanted a real one but i never expected he would die in a week'
And at that moment the cockerel, whose legs are up and laying on his back, opens an eye and says to the farmer: "shhhh and get out of here before you scare the vulture"
 

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Discussion Starter #20
A farmer went out one day and bought a brand new stud cockerel for his chicken coop. The new cockerel struts over to the old cockerel and says, "OK old fart, time for you to retire." The old cockerel replies, "Come on, surely you cannot handle ALL of these chickens. Look what it has done to me. Can't you just let me have the two old hens over in the corner? " The young cockerel says, "Beat it: You are washed up and I am taking over." The old cockerel says, "I tell you what, young stud. I will race you around the farmhouse. Whoever wins gets the exclusive domain over the entire chicken coop." The young cockerel laughs. "You know you don't stand a chance, old man. So, just to be fair, I will give you a head start." The old cockerel takes off running. About 15 seconds later the young cockerel takes off running after him. They round the front porch of the farmhouse and the young cockerel has closed the gap. He is only about 5 feet behind the old cockerel and gaining fast.

The farmer, meanwhile, is sitting in his usual spot on the front porch when he sees the cockerels running by. He grabs his shotgun and - BOOM - he blows the young cockerel to bits. The farmer sadly shakes his head and says, "Darn.....third gay cockerel I bought this month."

Moral of this story? ... Don't mess with the OLD FARTS - age, skill and treachery will always overcome youth and arrogance!



:cheese::cheese::cheese:

:vomit: & :evil:

Remind me not to mess with you :eek:


I'm quite safe really.....:lol:
 
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