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useless

  1. Useless old dealers...

    General Alfa Discussion
    Poor old Alfa.. First the rust, then the unreliability... now this, Auto Express and Driver Power survey. :D Britain?s best car dealers 2016 Ralf S.
  2. Help I'm useless!

    Alfa GTA
    I'm removing the front bank coil cover to clean and paint and have ****ed it up... All bolts are out cover is dislodged but I can't get it out due to the wiring leading to the fuel rail. How do I disconnect the little black connectors to the fuel rail to free it up?
  3. 'tel'-button. Phone button, useless? (giulietta)

    ICE & Blue&Me
    So I have a Giulietta, enjoy it to bits, lovely car. But I can't wrap my head around why I have a dedicated button for my phone when it does absolutely nothing. All it shows is whether my phone is connected or not. Should it be doing anything else? (and is there any point in updating firmware...
  4. Hatchbacks vermin of the car world

    Rant Room
    Anybody else hate hatchback cars?? I noticed ages ago that every time I am slowed down in traffic or at road junctions or round abouts then it is usually a hatch back to blame. This is because they are preferred by new drivers, elderly ppl, ppl who don't like driving, households second car etc...
  5. Why are Bose so useless?

    The Technology Section
    I bought a pair of QC3 Bose headphones for £300 2 years ago. Now I only get sound out of one ear. I just took them back to the Bose store and they said that because they are out of warranty they could only offer half the value to trade in for another pair. I didn't want to throw good money after...
  6. CD changer is useless

    Alfa 147, 156 & GT
    When I bought my GT the caddie from the Auto Changer was missing. I sourced one from eBay for a tenner. As per usual I copy the CD's I put in the car but have found that they are verging on useless as they are constantly skipping. I do have one original CD in the changer and whilst it is an...
  7. Avic-F30BT.... Useless

    ICE & Blue&Me
    Hi all Well, fitted the new Avic-F30BT into my Alfa..... and its totally rubbish The touch screen system basically is the most appalling touchscreen system I have ever used. It just cannot pick up (even after calibration) where your finger is and it take about 20 attempts to drag 'n' drop...
  8. alfa uk parts useless!!

    Alfa 147, 156 & GT
    i ordered my brake parts as listed in esper (rubber and metal from resivior to master cylinder x2 approx 1/2meter long). discussed with alfa canterbury and derby as the illustration looks nothing like the part. picked the parts up today, and they look just like the esper illustration for a left...
  9. GT Tyres? (that aren't useless in snow)

    Alfa 147, 156 & GT
    Hi all, I need to change the tyres on my GT due to wear. I've got cheap Nexens on just now which I can't say I'm a fan of so I'm looking to change brand to one of the known brands. I had thought about getting winter tyres due to the current conditions but can't find stock so summer tyres will...
  10. Useless stuff I've removed from my GTV

    Alfa GTV & 916 Spider
    A list of useless stuff I've removed from my GTV: spare wheel catalytic converter rear headrests rear speakers rear seatbelts undertray metal airbox bracket sun visors aerial and aerial motor intake resonators middle muffler lift-up reverse mechanism plastic seat runner covers OEM steering...
  11. MCSF - the world's most useless error message

    Alfa 147, 156 & GT
    So there I am driving along, when I get a brief hesitation just as I was accelerating in 4th gear. BING BONG "Motor control system failure - go to dealer" Hmmmm thinks I. Wonder what that's about. Engine's still running fine but I pull over just up the road, turn it off and check the obvious...
  12. Mito Blue&Me USB facility - useless!

    Alfa MiTo
    Hi I've had my Mito a week, and have given up on the USB facility to play MP3 files now. I bought a high speed USB memory stick and added 200 general tracks and ten albums in folders. All MP3, the stick is FAT32. Initially it worked fine. A few days later, it stopped working - the media...
  13. Bloody useless drivers...

    Alfa GTV & 916 Spider
    Just thought I would have a rant... Got hit up the back on my way home from work tonight. I stopped for a roundabout and the bloke behind didn't. :cry::cry: It was relatively low speed but the paint on the bumper is tatered. All a pain in the **** really. Put the claim into my own insurance...
  14. Useless scrap on our roads... (ranting and raving)

    South Africa
    Have anyone else noticed this?? Most of the time when we are crawling along on the highway, a quick peek to the front of the cue reveals a Hyundai Atos (or the I10) with kilometers of space between it and the car in front of it... grrrrr :rant: Why can't they ban that crap from the roads or...
  15. Useless

    Alfa 147, 156 & GT
    It is official, take a 147 with Eibach/FSDs and put 225 Goodyear F1 tyres on it and you have a car which handles sensationally in the dry and wet but is absolutely useless in the snow!:lol: We've only just got our first proper snow up here yesterday and my car already got stuck trying to get up...
  16. No xmas card for the useless garage!

    Introduce Yourself
    Hi everyone, I've recently lost my 156 sportwagon to a cambelt failure thanks to a poor change by the previous owner so I immediatley booked my 147 2.0 lusso in to a national garage to get it changed as I didn't know if or when it was last changed. At this point my problems started.....brace...
  17. 147 alarm help!!!! dealer useless!!!

    Alfa 147, 156 & GT
    my first newbie alfa problem on a 147 jtd mjet. alarms keeps going off randomly when i get in the light on the "key" switch flashes 5 times which acording to the owners manual is sloping or jacking of the car. if it was windy and the car was being rocked i could understand it going off but its...
  18. 147 Tool Kit, completely useless!

    Alfa 147, 156 & GT
    Has anyone tried using the Wheel Brace provided? to say the least at trying to get Locking wheelnuts off with the provided equipment if near impossible.:mad: Due to the provided Wheel Brace being made of chocolate, i now have one damaged wheel, a really painful back and blistered hands. I...
  19. Useless screen washer jets

    Alfa 164 & 166
    Got a bit of a problem with my 166, the screen washers are awful. From my experiences with other Italian cars, I'd say that the non-return valves are shot. e-learn only shows how to remove the pump or the jets themselves. ePER shows 2 non-return valves on the parts diagram but no location...
  20. GTV Master Key/Code pictures? + couple of useless questions...

    Alfa GTV & 916 Spider
    Hi folks, I seem to be failing in finding an image of what a GTV master key should look like, and how it differs from the "normal" key. Also... Code tag? *faints* So, can anyone show me a decent image of a GTV master key? It would be much appreciated! All I know is, I'm looking for "a brown...
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