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  1. No dials working and pretty much all warning lights on.. No Joke..

    Alfa 147, 156 & GT
    Just started the car (2005 GT JTDm) which had been driving fine earlier today, and there is virtually no dials (rev, speedo, fuel and temp), of buttons working and most warning lights are on. Fuel light flashing. Disconnected battery and it reset itself and even the airbag light was off (bonus)...
  2. Battery Joke by Main Stealer

    Alfa 159, Brera & 946 Spider
    Hello, my 7 yr old 159 wouldn't start today due to a flat battery. As its still the original one and the car has 103,000 miles I thought a new battery would be in order. I called the main dealer in Canterbury and the quote was.... £215 fitted I popped over to a small indie in Aylesham and left...
  3. Is this a joke?

    Alfa 147, 156 & GT
    Surely this can't be correct? :eek: A nice knob (easy now) but come on.... Alfa Romeo Leather Gear Knob Black Shift Giulietta Mito 147 GT 159 156 Brera NEW | eBay
  4. Friday Joke

    South Africa
  5. AR CS a Joke!!!

    Alfa Giulietta
    Sorry I am going to have a rant here. My Car is an AR Giulietta 1.4 TCT Veloce spec So my car was booked in for its service today and to look at some on going issues, since purchasing the car (intermittent Squeaky breaks, intermittent delayed gear changes especially from a cold start...
  6. Time to Lighten the AOSA mood- Funny Joke inside

    South Africa
    Guys, geez things are tense on the SA lounge nowadays so i thought heres some Car Humour, its a ad on gumtree.
  7. The Royal visit to a Scottish hospital

    Way Off Topic
    Prince Charles is visiting an Edinburgh hospital. He enters a ward full of patients with no obvious sign of injury or illness and greets one. The patient replies: "Fair fa your honest sonsie face, Great chieftain o the puddin race, Aboon them a ye take yer place, Painch, tripe or thairm, As...
  8. Pro Rata refund? - what a joke!

    Adrian Flux Insurance
    I sold one of my cars last week which is insured by Adrian Flux (as is my other one) I'm currently 6 weeks into my insurance with them on this policy for a 350z I called them up to cancel and was told I would receive a pro rata refund on my remaining time with them. This is where is gets funny...
  9. quick joke

    General Alfa Discussion
    what does a driver say before a accident ? merc driver oh dear bmw driver ah no boet golf driver ahh not again alfa driver here hold my espresso and watch this move :lol:
  10. Complete Joke.....

    Alfa MiTo
    First of all let me start by saying that being completely new to owning a Alfa Romeo and my new Mito QV. Since I've owned the car new from April of this year the mechanical side and the car is out of this world, great to drive extremely fast and a joy to own and drive, UNTIL this on going issue...
  11. I just bought a 2nd hand rifle on eBay

    Way Off Topic
    When I got it home it wouldn't fire. Bang out of order....
  12. 20mph - simply a joke

    General Motoring Discussion
    Are we all just gonna sit back and let councils impose 20mph limits everywhere? I was actually undertaken by a push bike the other day? What with web snooping as well on the way I have just about had enough. We are moving ever closer to George Orwell's 1984 as each day passes.
  13. If England

    Way Off Topic
    beet the Swedes tonight, it will be a real turnip for the books....
  14. I've always enjoyed a good joke!

    Non Motoring Images
  15. Joke of the Day

    Alfa Romeo Cyprus Club
    Εχω παχυνει πολυ τελευταια και φταiει γι'αυτο το κωλοσαμπουαν μου.... Τωρα προσεξα οτι γραφει στην ετικετα ''Προσθετει ογκο''.... Απο σημερα θα κανω μπανιο με το απορρυπαντικο για τα πιατα... Γραφει ''Αφαιρει τα λιπη'' !!!
  16. ALFA insurance a joke

    Alfa 147, 156 & GT
    Hi guys I need insure my 156 2.4 jdt veloce 2001 ! I'm getting quotes from £560 -£960 I'm 39 with full no claims what a joke! The cars wurth f all Not happy!!!!! Rank over Regards John
  17. Joke of the week

    South Africa
    Recieved this via email and thought I'd share in light of recent events While walking down the street this past Tuesday a “Member of Parliament" was tragically hit by a truck and died. His soul arrived in heaven and was met by St. Peter at the entrance. ‘Welcome to heaven,’ said St. Peter...
  18. The Joke Thread

    Republic of Ireland
    'Cos we all need a laugh thesedays damn it! I got his one off me mates facebook and thought I'd share it. There is currently a debate on whether or not to show The Flinstones in the Middle East. The people in Dubai don't get the humour, but the people of Abu Dhabi do. Boom boom:D
  19. One for the serious detailers

    Car Detailing
    For those of you that don't get it, then you are not a serious detailer ! :cheese: Moz's Detailers Inc. versus Lambo LP560-4 Spyder (warning Detailing Porn alert!)
  20. ?? Joke or deluded

    General Motoring Discussion
    Is "Gary" for real V8 ?