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Idiot Alert.

Just received this and thought I'd share it.



The sad thing is these are probably all true!!


IDIOT SIGHTING #1

My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the girl a £5 note. Our total was £4.20, so I also handed her a Twenty pence piece.

She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I know, but that way you can just give me a pound back.'
She was puzzled and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the 20 pence and said 'We're sorry but they could not do that kind of thing.' The girl then proceeded to give me back 80 pence in change!
Do not confuse the staff at MacD's.

IDIOT SIGHTING #2

We had to have the garage door repaired. The GARADOR repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one GARADOR made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, 'Madam, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4 and he said, 'NOOO, it's not. Four is larger than two...'
We haven't used Garador repair since. Happened in Moor Park , Nr Watford UK


IDIOT SIGHTING #3

I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbour call the local town council office to request the removal of the "DEER CROSSING" sign on our road. She said the reason was: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'
Story from Potters Bar, Herts , UK

IDIOT SIGHTING #4

My daughter went to a local Kentucky Fried and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.' He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.
>From South Oxhey Herts , UK ...

IDIOT SIGHTING #5

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an Irish airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge? To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?" He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'
Happened Luton Airport ... UK

IDIOT SIGHTING #6

The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged co-worker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'
She is a Local County Councillor employee in Harrow, Middlesex , UK

IDIOT SIGHTING #7

When my husband and I arrived at Our Local Ford dealer to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the drivers side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the Fitter/Mechanic, 'its open!' His reply, 'I know. I have already done that side.'
This was at Ford dealership in St Albans,Hertfordshire UK .


IDIOT SIGHTING #8

A coach party were out for the day, stopped of at a refreshment halt in Hertfordshire and queued up for tea and coffee. One group asked for "Six decaffeinated please." To which the girl replied: " Sorry, we only do coffee!"
Story from Luton Probus.

STAY ALERT! They walk among us, and the scary part is that they have the RIGHT TO VOTE and to PRODUCE!



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funny stuff! I've had the 'you have given me too much money' one loads myself, and thses people work with money all the time!

Guy at work told me once that he and his wife went to the pub, and she saw the sign saying 'over 21 patrons only' she looked at him and said 'but there's only two of us!' she did realise her fault and laughed saying 'oh, I've done it again haven't I'

Again!?! God have Mercy on us all!
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You couldn't make it up
 
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A few I overheard on a trip to San Diego Zoo a few years ago. -

1. We were in a crowd trying to catch a glimpse of a giant Panda on loan from some Chinese zoo. They had a keeper on hand to answer visitors questions. Although pretty knowledgeable he was stumped by "Why is it on loan? Can't you afford to buy it?"

2. Standing watching a recently born baby camel, another visitor was having trouble seeing the cute little thing hiding behind its mum's legs. Her friend helped her out by saying "Oh isn't it a darling! Clinging on to it's mom's back like that" Er no madam, that'll be its hump.

And there were more in a similar vein ........
 
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great post
 
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a friend once mentioned that she always took notice of the weather on Coronation Street as it was filmed in advance. this way she could forecast next weeks weather

...to make things even more surreal, while i was stunned into complete gobsmackedness, my other mate agreed with her!

My second mate is naturally blonde and believes that wind turbines control Sky tv
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fee View Post
a friend once mentioned that she always took notice of the weather on Coronation Street as it was filmed in advance. this way she could forecast next weeks weather

...to make things even more surreal, while i was stunned into complete gobsmackedness, my other mate agreed with her!

My second mate is naturally blonde and believes that wind turbines control Sky tv
You mean that these ideas aren't true ? Darn it it, no wonder I'm always getting soaked and my TV stops working.
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Who needs jokes when you can just look at what happens around you...... :HAPPY:
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Biting lip, not posting a single things MrsH has done !! :innocent:
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A blonde acquaintance of ours entered our local pub the other day, and upon reaching the bar, begain warming her hands on the purple lighted device set on the bar. She was told shortly thereafter that she was wasting her time, that it was actually a fly zapper...true story !
 
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at a Maccy D drive through, I was asked what drink I wanted. So I said a sparkling Fanta. The question that came back from the creme de la creme of their team, was 'is that still or fizzy'.

At an airport check in queue, the couple in front asked to be upgraded to first class. Taking one look at the couple's dragged through a hedge backwards sense of dress, the checkin lady declined the request. To which the gentleman replied: 'in that case, can we sit as close to first class as possible?'
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an old one but a good one (and true) - my mrs and i went into a shop called 'everything 9TP' (crap name i know) i bet you can guess what she said............ "there aren't any price tags on anything" i think the look on my face conveyed the answer to her!
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Had the same in the Pound shop in Derby, shop assistant had to really try to avoid eye contact with me as he said to the customer "Errmmm, I think those are a pound"
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Putting a 'downer' on Beds and Herts folk that is. Common sense is in very short supply down this way.
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Whilst holidaying in Portugal at the in-laws place, Mrs Winja kept asking a portugese lad, who worked for my in-laws, all sort of daft things and kept asking him to translate things into english. "What does that sign mean?, what did that man say?" ect.

One morning we heard a cat meowing in the garden outside. "Miguel", she said. "What's that cat saying"?

Dozy mare.
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When I was in New York in 2003, I went to the cinema to see Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life. (Starring Scottish actor Gerard Butler playing a Scottish character)

As I was exiting the cinema, I heard one native exclaim in disgust "that guy was doing a really fake Irish accent!.."

Ahem
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remembered another one; I used to represent a well-known manufacturer of colour printers (I get all the best jobs)

I sent a new unit to a well-known IT publishing house for a product review. After it arrived, I got a call asking for extra supplies of the cyan, yellow, magenta and black ink, which I duly sent on. Three days later, I took another call from the publishing house's test labs, and they asked: "Thanks for sending in the extra ink, but are those the only colours it prints in?"

Died laughing doesn't even comes close to describing what I went through

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Sometimes in the darkest hour, love comes shining through.
Then it doesn't seem so far from me to you.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scudetto View Post
remembered another one; I used to represent a well-known manufacturer of colour printers (I get all the best jobs)

I sent a new unit to a well-known IT publishing house for a product review. After it arrived, I got a call asking for extra supplies of the cyan, yellow, magenta and black ink, which I duly sent on. Three days later, I took another call from the publishing house's test labs, and they asked: "Thanks for sending in the extra ink, but are those the only colours it prints in?"

Died laughing doesn't even comes close to describing what I went through
I was drinking water as I read your story.

Bad idea.
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Drinking water is always a bad idea,

as of this morning I have 3 different types of Welsh whiskey to enjoy, and some Welsh vodka to leave well alone.
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