I fall into one of two camps.
If you need money I'll give it to you (if I can afford it), but don't take the p155 and I don't expect it back, that's what giving means.
However, if you asked to borrow money then I DO want and expect it back, if you don't, don't bother asking for more.
A freinds husband had a similar (in outcome) problem and borrowed money all over the shop, I first gave, then loaned some cash (although not the £13000 he'd originally asked for!!), to enable him to pay some bills and keep the wolf from the door.
However, his situation got worse and worse and he ended up (after releasing equity in it to pay people back) losing his house. Now he (and his wife) live in a small (but modern) flat/apartment and pay more in rent than their previous household bills combined!
He was a financial advisor too, we think that he invested in something a little "high risk", but didn't tell the people whose money he was using that they may lose it all, and they did!
Sorry for the hijack Al, but it's not just your family that can get into a debt spiral....
Now if only I can find that £10k for the 159 Q4 that's just appeared for sale up the road.
PS a loose pipe on a boiler can cause a buildup of CO, it's an invisible, silent killer. Especially for 'vunerable' people. <-WARNING, NOT A HINT!