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(Post Link) post #1 of 50 Old 07-07-08 Thread Starter
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Driving too close to me.

The closer you drive to my rear bumper the slower I will drive!
I dont even mind people following me closely if they are friends or following me.

Coming off the M4 onto the M25 this morning on a one lane slip road (following another car), a blinking flipper of a bloke decides to drive at about 1 foot away from my bumper in his white van. A tap of the brakes: Nothing. I then slowed down to a safe speed (). He got very angry and proceded to chase me up the M25 and dive in front of me.

As I went up the slip road off the M4 he pulled alongside and waved frantically at me and was shouting. I pointed and laughed. This made him wave a bit more.

I am now calm. I hope the van driver is wound up and fuming all day. He deserves it!

WWJD?
(What Would Jesus Drive?)

Are we nearly there yet?
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Re: Driving too close to me.

The pointing & laughing bit was priceless, well done
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(Post Link) post #3 of 50 Old 07-07-08 Thread Starter
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Re: Driving too close to me.

I was so mad I couldn't do anything else.
It was defo a fake laugh as I was seething
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Re: Driving too close to me.

But it seems to have worked well
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Re: Driving too close to me.

Good on you MPH ... Pointing and laughing def did the trick.. Will have to remember that in future..
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(Post Link) post #6 of 50 Old 07-07-08 Thread Starter
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Re: Driving too close to me.

Made him furious.
I just need some blue lights on my car. That would really do the trick
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Re: Driving too close to me.

Yep works a treat for me too.

On the odd occasion that someone feels the need to drive quicker than me, right up my chuff, I adopt the same idea.

A round of applause, once I allow them to squeeze past, normally makes them madder and me happier...
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Re: Driving too close to me.

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Originally Posted by Hunter View Post
A round of applause, once I allow them to squeeze past, normally makes them madder and me happier...
I employ this technique regularly, especially when people block my exit out of a side road, I hate that... just leave a space you prat, you're not going anywhere!
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Re: Driving too close to me.

Often if I have to make a right turn into a side road, and someone has been following me closely, I always take a long time to make the turn, just to hold them up. You can sometimes see them nearly chewing the steering wheel in frustration.
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Re: Driving too close to me.

i did just the same to some tool in a brand new RS6 on saturday - driving mrs al's focus on a long uphill stretch of motorway. 2 lanes, i was in the outside lane doing about 80, inside lane totally full. so up my backside comes RS6 man for about half a mile, 2 inches off my rear bumper, weaving from one side to the other trying to intimidate me. i couldn't pull over as the inside lane was full, i couldn't go any faster as i was doing 80 anyway and a fully laden focus 1.6 ain't exactly a rocket on the uphills so when i did eventually see a gap in the inside lane i pulled over and gave him the 'coffee beans' sign as he passed.

next thing i know i'm pulling off onto my exit and he decides he's coming off there as well so lurches across from the outside lane onto the sliproad cutting me up big time, seriously dangerous driving. normally i'll turn the other cheek but when i've got my 4 year old child and pregnant wife in the car this stuff gets the red mist coming down. so lo and behold he has to stop at the red lights at the bottom of the slip road, me right behind him. what i did next was very stupid but my fury got the better of me - i stormed out of my car and started marching up to his. i was f***ng LIVID anyway he [email protected] himself and screeched away through the red light to get away, at which point i just stood there and pointed at him, laughing my head off. i do hope he was watching in his rear-view

all's well that ends well i suppose

- Keepin' it moist -
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Re: Driving too close to me.

Nice Al...


Audi drivers are the new BMW drivers.. it is true.. I had an RS6 up my backside on the M25 this morning and I was surrounded by lanes full of traffic. Even the one I was in was packed. He tried to undertake me about 4 times.

Idiot.

On a lighter note, a Quattro tried to take me off the line at some lights yesterday. All very well but he was in a lane to turn off left.

Needless to say he wasn't sucessful.

Quite nice not having the engine size on the back of the car I guess.

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Re: Driving too close to me.

I once got seriously cut up by a scooby doo (had to do some serious braking to avoid hitting him), at the next set of lights I did some "hand waving", in response he blew a kiss back ... and I just had to laugh.


I was tail gated today by a woman driving a gold coloured skoda!!! show some respect please!!!
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Re: Driving too close to me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MPH View Post
The closer you drive to my rear bumper the slower I will drive!
I hate you!
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Re: Driving too close to me.

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I then slowed down to a safe speed

So why were you doing an unsafe speed before?
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Re: Driving too close to me.

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Originally Posted by 156Chris View Post
I once got seriously cut up by a scooby doo (had to do some serious braking to avoid hitting him), at the next set of lights I did some "hand waving", in response he blew a kiss back ... and I just had to laugh.


I was tail gated today by a woman driving a gold coloured skoda!!! show some respect please!!!


BTW, what's the "coffee beans" sign that Al mentioned??
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Re: Driving too close to me.

A numbty thrust his front end out into traffic a few weeks ago leaving the local co-op, causing the car in front of me to brake and swerve. I was in quite a good mood so I took up the slack and made sure he couldn't get out in front of me either but smiled in a friendly manner as I went past him.
This seemed to really infuriate him and sure enough he pulled out and glued himself to my bumper, shouting and gesticulating in a somewhat irate manner. I kept to the designated 30mph and tried to placate him with my friendly smile every time I checked my mirrors but he just seemed to get redder and redder!
We stopped at a couple of junctions but he made no attempts to get out and he finally turned off about a mile or so down the road, still really irate judging by the speed he took off at, so focussed he didn't even return my wave!
Funnily enough I was in a good mood for the rest of the day, really calms you down all that smiling and I think it worried him as well, he probably thought I was a proper nutter!
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Re: Driving too close to me.

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BTW, what's the "coffee beans" sign that Al mentioned??
It goes back to an old coffee advert where they showing how great the coffee beans smelt by putting a few in a hand and shaking them back and forth ... I think the swear filter would prevent me writing what it actually looks like ...
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Re: Driving too close to me.

Some great techniques here! Personally, my favourite was with one w****r who persisted in staying in the overtaking lane up a long, steep hill-then moved over but attempted to "undertake" me once I had moved past him and back into lane. As he came alongside, I had my daughter take his photo. The look on his face was priceless!! If only he knew there was no film in the camera.
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Re: Driving too close to me.

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As he came alongside, I had my daughter take his photo. The look on his face was priceless!! If only he knew there was no film in the camera.
Genius!

I got video of a guy looking through his appointment diary, balanced on the steering wheel and flicking through pages... all whilst we're doing 60 on the M25.

Thing is, the ***** was in a branded vehicle. I emailed the company and got a phonecall pretty much straight back from the Operations Manager who said he knew who the driver was, and wanted to see the video. I got convinced by my colleagues not to email it across in case the guy lost his job, but I hope he got a telling off.
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Re: Driving too close to me.

I really hate drivers that will not move out of the way. I usually come accross each day on the A45 direction Brum It's a 2 lane dual carridgway but even if the inside lane is clear, they refuse to get over I've stopped flashing / tailgating now. I just size them up and glide on by on the inside. The weird thing is that I'd get done for this. Car's should be fitted with a standard 20mm cannon in the nose just for these people
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Re: Driving too close to me.

* puts on saintly clothing, halo polished..*

I know it's satisfying to wind up some p***k who has been driving in an inconsiderate or maybe dangerous way putting you or yours at greater risk

BUT

do you not think that by increasing the other driver's state of rage or whatever, after they have gone away at a rate of knots, you have then put other road users at more risk just to your satisfy yourself?

I'd never done or would do anything of the sort, naturally.
 
(Post Link) post #22 of 50 Old 09-07-08 Thread Starter
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Re: Driving too close to me.

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I hate you!
I know
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(Post Link) post #23 of 50 Old 09-07-08 Thread Starter
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Re: Driving too close to me.

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So why were you doing an unsafe speed before?
Ha, no but not much damage would be done to a car at 25 MPH

Was always taught if someone was following you too close you should increase the distance between yourself and the car in front of you. This gives you better warning of anything happening.

My evil side just wanted to see him squirrm
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Re: Driving too close to me.

Had a blond with Victoria Beckham sunglasses behind me this morning in a red Hyundai jump a red light as I went through at amber (safely of course). Anyway next set of traffic lights go amber when I'm 40 yards away so I of course stop safely. You should have seen her car squirming when she slammed on the anchors as she'd decided she was going to jump this one as well and had speeded up to try get through. Best bit is she started shaking her head and swearing at me for stopping at a red light, silly cow.
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Re: Driving too close to me.

I've also used the point and laugh technique. However, even greater effect can be sought by the kiss and blow technique , followed up with a wink and then raucous laughter to one's self . Seems white van man, RS6 man and lowered/blinged Saxo/Clio/Nova man particularly dislikes this technique - Happy Days
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