Not cold callers per se, but their techniques - Alfa Romeo Forum
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(Post Link) post #1 of 32 Old 27-01-18 Thread Starter
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Not cold callers per se, but their techniques

Good people of AO. Before we start, some disclaimers.

This isn't a rage fueled, face-contorted rant that'll make the foundations of your house shake. I'm sorry about that. It'll even show some sympathy for those that are the subject of it - cold callers, the people with the worst job in the world - knowing that as they glumly trudge into work, 99% of the calls they make will result in them being told to **** off, fepp off or have people hanging up on them mid sentence.

So, when they call the office to offer a professional service (oi! cheeky! a professional service for the business, not 'that' sort of professional service!), I have some sympathy for them. I usually listen (after all, they may well have something useful to offer), and after explaining that we don't need that service, I warmly bid them a good day. We can wrap up the call in 30 seconds without me acting like an ar5e wipe, or making them feel like an ar5e wipe for calling. Everyone's a winner, right?

But... there are two increasingly common techniques that are starting to get on my wick (check the edgy language there! )

"Hello Mr Scud. My name's Heather from Network Solutions. Do you remember we spoke in October about your network security and you asked me to call you back?" Now, that's the trap they want you to fall into. They are hedging their bets on you being busy, not remembering everyone you have spoken to three months ago, and - most importantly - that spur-of-the-moment, on-the-hoof social awkwardness; i.e you being too embarrassed to admit to them that you have forgotten them. They are counting on you to either say 'Err, err, err, no I don't remember, but please remind me', or lie and say, 'Yes, I think so, but can you remind me?' Either response, and - Bang! - they're in.

Trouble is, I do remember every call. And I know full well I did not speak to Heather from Network Solutions. Because A) network security is not my responsibility b) We have a company that manages it and there are no plans to change.

The thing that is wrong with this approach, is that the service provider's call is based on one thing - a lie. But we are not going to engage with any service provider who starts an approach to a relationship with... a lie.

Second one that's now quite common.

Phone rings, work bud picks it up, and the voice at the other ends says: "Hello, I'd like to speak to Mr Scud. It's Reginald Tremble-Knees from Fortisan & Frimble. [here comes the arrogance] He's expecting my call." Erm, no he chuffing well isn't.

And that my friends, is about as much rage as I can manage on this terrible matter.

I thank thee
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Last edited by Scudetto; 27-01-18 at 21:12.
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Don't forget "If you buy something as the result of a cold call, under distance selling regulations you usually have seven working days from the day after you receive the item to change your mind and return it."
You can send back Heathers solutions. If you book an appointment to discuss them you'll lose this right. She's trying to get you to invite you to sell you those solutions.
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I won't be buying anyway, Cue2 - not from a blatant fibber
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I too am experiencing two different cold call annoyances, but they are different ones.

1) Ring! “Hello [Unintelligible drivel delivered really quickly about something or other totally unrelated to what I do followed by] just to confirm your e-mail is XYZ, I’ll be sending that to you now” CLICK.

2) “Hello, you were recently browsing our website/downloading our white paper on..”

All very tedious, but at least they aren’t fibbing.
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You're supposed to accidentally correct them. A journalistic technique to find out things.
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I've got loads recently. Mostly financial package selling. "I'm unemployed." "Ah. Goodbye."

Also loads from car sales and car service customer follow ups. Mostly BMW.
I keep rating them "1" (lowest out of 10) which makes them call back. Then lay on the criticism about their terrible database that needs fixing.
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I’m sure this has been the subject of priors Rants....but the one that really gets my blood pressure stratospheric is:

“I understand you’ve been involved in an accident recently”

Big, fat, whopping black lie.

My phone has so many blocked 020 numbers now
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I find the following approach tends to work:

Them “we’d like to sell you double glazing/whatever....”
Me (spinning the mental bottle of how vile their sales pressure is) ”Yeah sure, come round tomorrow, the address is (non-existent 2 doors up from us, in the middle of the road)

I’ve had the odd enraged call the next day, I thank them for wasting their own time.

Done it at work as well, a particularly persistent and aggressive vendor, dragged the whole team in for a meeting which they hoped would be a wonder sale. Item 1 on the agenda: how many times do I have to do this until you never ring me again?
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"Hi there, Sterzo, how are you today?" No intro, no explanation, no statement of who they are. Grrrr....
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Originally Posted by TheGrimJeeper View Post
Also loads from car sales and car service customer follow ups. Mostly BMW.
I keep rating them "1" (lowest out of 10) which makes them call back. Then lay on the criticism about their terrible database that needs fixing.
You must be very lonely.
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It passes the time whilst I sun myself, drinking coffee ...
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It passes the time whilst I sun myself, drinking coffee ...
Yep, replace coffee with all inclusive beer. and people trying to sell me trinkets and counterfeit goods.
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I'm still getting the 'Talk Talk, router, problem with your computer' calls, if I have the time and inclination I let them go through all the procedures, I say my computer needs booting, have a coffee, tidy the garden, apologise for the time taken and pretend I'm going through their instructions. Waste 20 minutes of their time before I confess that I know it is a scam. That way at least they're not spending that time on some poor unsuspecting person.

But the sort of ruse you're experiencing goes back many years. When I was first married my mother received a phone call from someone saying they'd seen my marriage reported in the local paper and as a long lost friend wished to congratulate me and could he have my new phone number. Turned out he wasn't a friend but an insurance salesman, I reported him to his head office and said that as a result of the underhand techniques of their staff I certainly would not be using any of their services.


If you're with Talk Talk 14258 followed up by ** will block the number. 1 then informs TT that the number is a scam. Other comms companies must have a similar facility.

Last edited by armoore; 29-01-18 at 08:38.
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I was being plagued with the Bitcoin Loophole scammers and also now have a couple of dozen 020 numbers blocked. If I get any now, I don't hang up, I just put the phone down and let them talk to themselves and then block the number when they do hang up.
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I'm still getting the 'Talk Talk, routerr, problem with your computer' calls, if I have the time and inclination I let them go through all the procedures, I say my computer needs booting, have a coffee, tidy the garden, apologise for the time taken and pretend I'm going through their instructions. Waste 20 minutes of their time before I confess that I know it is a scam. That way at least they're not spending that time on some poor unsuspecting person.
At some point in the conversation I ask them to prove that they are from TalkTalk. They quote my account number, which proves that they are not from TalkTalk. I then ask them to give me two random characters from my password, at which point they usually hang up although I have had one who did think it worth giving me a couple of letters on the off-chance that she'd guessed correctly!

I had one get really mad at me last year. He asked me to look for the key with the flag on it. I said I couldn't find such a key. After repeated attempts, telling me where to look & me repeatedly telling him I couldn't find it, it said "would it help if I pressed the "Windows" key?". . .

The plural of "anecdote" is not "data".
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I had one who asked what I could see on the screen, I countered with "tell me what I should be looking for?" That went on for five minutes until he lost it and accused me of wasting his time, my reply: "that was the whole point!"
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If anyone calls about my computer I ask them which computer, that their information must be incorrect as I don't have one, and I use the same tactics with the accident people too.

I am TPS registered, but a few still get through.
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One I'm planning on trying with the 'you've had a car accident' caller is to say " yeah I did, but it was my fault, I was drunk and driving on the wrong side of the road". See what they say then.
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A nice man said they'd detected a problem with my computer, so I asked him which one, was it the grey one or the pink one. This seemed to irritate him because he shouted "all your computers!"
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Anyone noticed that there's an ad for a telemarketing company at the bottom of this thread?
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Last edited by armoore; 30-01-18 at 15:12.
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Anyone noticed that there's an ad for ar telemarketing company at the bottom of this thread?
https://1blocker.com/

Not necessarily
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Anyone noticed that there's an ad for ar telemarketing company at the bottom of this thread?
Cookies.

Verstuurd vanaf mijn GT-I9505 met Tapatalk
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I get more than my fair share, I think, because of my job. I do try to be polite per G's thoughts earlier but it is increasingly hard. I appreciate they have a job to do but they seem to forget that I have one to do as well and seem oblivious to the fact that I might be busy.

If any of my normal suppliers want a meeting they may drop me a note, send an invite or quick call and then, at the allocated time we'd get together, exchange pleasantries, have a coffee, talk a bit about football or F1 or whatever then discuss business and be done in less than an hour.

These cold callers seem to think because you picked up their call they have a divine right to your undivided attention for at least several minutes while they pitch you their product or services. If you are polite it is often nigh on impossible to get them to pause for breath or listen to you politely trying to get a word in.

They often begin with repeating your name back, yes that's me..."I believe you are the person responsible for......and we are the world's largest provider of......and on and on....!"

Like I said. It's getting hard to keep being polite. More and more of the obnoxious, pushy ones get a "no thanks, not interested" which they ignore and keep prattling so I just hang up.


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https://1blocker.com/

Not necessarily
Ah! I thought Adblocker would've sorted that out. I also have cookies blocked. I'll try the 1blocker.



Update: 1blocker does not work with my (older) iPad.

Last edited by armoore; 30-01-18 at 15:11.
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My brother was called by a scammer who told him they'd found problems with his PC. He replied , very concerned. He followed the instruction to fix it but had difficulty finding some of the controls. The operative had to find "the controller" at the call centre. He then said which icon to find and my brother still couldn't find it. Oh , he has an Apple IMac. Successfully wasted the time of the time wasters who called and they weren't happy.
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