I understand and sympathise with shift workers. My dad used to work 6-2 and 2-10 and often nights (especially in the 70's). I'm fortunate not to have to do that (so far). Sometimes I have very early starts (5am), and very late finishes (10pm), but it isn't consistent, and I can't claim to live that lifestyle.
OK - got that out of the way.
If you do the following you are an absolute **** of the worst kind:
1) Get up every morning at 4:45am in order to leave the house at 6:20am. There's no need. You're being a ****.
2) Slam every door like it was part of a soap opera argument.
3) Fall out of bed, and begin to load your van noisily at 5am.
4) At 5:55am start your evil, clattery diesel, and leave it running for 20-30 mins.
5) Even contemplate putting a large screen TV on an adjoining bedroom wall, so that while you're revving the nuts off the van, your fag-honking witch can sit in her pit watching the news, while adding an additional veneer of noise-hate to the existing problem.
6) Conduct loud phone conversations underneath my bedroom window in the early hours.
You're an absolute pair of sweaty arsed basts and I hope something unfortunate befalls you, starting with the fag-draining tracksuit bint, and ending with you, with your personalised plated pot-bellied, posturing, arsewipe, scumbag, can't park straight, churns the grass verge because he can't even exit his drive in a straight line, leaves his heap in the narrow street, even though he has ample drivespace for 2, drives over windy day recycling debris on his front, leaving it to other people to clean up, daily microwave feeding, tv dinner, you big fat redneck bell end.
You need to move mate. Those ba5ta5dos will grind you down. The amusing 'do this to them, do that to them' responses are fun, but your neighbours are of the breed too unique to be troubled by any revenge act you inflict upon them.
I hear so many tales like yours, and while I don't have any answers, the same question keeps coming back - at what point did folks become such utter showers of revolting shiP that they just don't care about smashing up someone else's quality of life.
For what it costs, just move. The tragedy is - and without shattering your hopes - there's no guarantee your new neighbours won't be just as bad. The art of breeding anti-social, unthinking, thoughtless, gormless, uncouth, thick-as-pig-shiP morons, was established many, many years ago, I'm afraid