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View Poll Results: Are you any good at small talk?
Yes! - I can talk the back legs off a donkey 12 38.71%
No! - In a room full of strangers, I curl up in a corner and disappear 10 32.26%
Other (just for Pasi 9 29.03%
Voters: 31. You may not vote on this poll

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(Post Link) post #1 of 47 Old 01-12-05 Thread Starter
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Small talk

How good are you at small talk?

Can you walk into a room full of strangers and strike up a easy conversation with anyone?

Or are you a wallflower who struggles to find something interesting to talk about?



How does this affect your self-confidence?

Do you think this has helped/hindered you in life?

Given the chance would you change this aspect of yourself?
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(Post Link) post #2 of 47 Old 01-12-05 Thread Starter
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Re: Small talk

Personally, I am a very shy person. I find it very difficult to talk to people I have never met before, and I have to say that this does sometimes affect my self-confidence.

I know a number of people (and met a few at the last NAD meet ) who can just strike up a conversation with anyone, who are witty and engaging and just seem to be able to get on with people.

There are times I really wish I could be like that .

So, what is the secret?
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Re: Small talk

I voted yes, but in fact it maybe should have been other.
I could talk for England, but at the same time, I can be very shy with people I don't know well. Also, sometimes I 'go on a bit', and other peoples eyes start to glaze over...
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Re: Small talk

Fraser = GC. I'm getting better with age (and some training & experience), but I'm very aware of the fact that I can dry up easily and I can struggle to sound coherent sometimes.

This has been a hindrance becuase I feel that I can shut myself off to avoid awkward situations and also that I can be less assertive than would be useful.
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Re: Small talk

i just curl up in a corner and talk to no one as i am really shy and never have anything to say

for those of you on here that have had the honour and privelidge of meeting me in person, you will know it is true

*EDIT*...i have put my vote in the 1 reserved for pasi....do you think he will mind
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Re: Small talk

Quote:
Originally Posted by mr.orange
i just curl up in a corner and talk to no one as i am really shy and never have anything to say

for those of you on here that have had the honour and privelidge of meeting me in person, you will know it is true

Yeah, right!



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Re: Small talk

im very good with people i dont know in fact im a bit of a bugg*r!
i talk to anyone and always very quickly test the water to see what their personalities are like and then ajust myself to the level that they are on!
when i meet somebody whos not clued up i often take the p155 to make myself chuckle while they are none the wiser
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Re: Small talk

Usually I can walk up to someone and strike up a conversation without much of a problem. Unless that person is Bazza.
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Re: Small talk

Quote:
Originally Posted by Green Cloverleaf
Yeah, right!




...cmon GC, you have had the privelidge of meeting me
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Re: Small talk

My experience is that almost everybody is shy in a room full of strangers

The "trick" is to swallow your fears and just have a go..... most people will envy your ability to break the ice...... it'll do wonders for your confidence

If someone knocks you back just move on

But whatever you do ..... don't talk about yourself... ask questions and show interest (even if you picked the local bore)

Practice makes perfect
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Re: Small talk

I used to be the sort of person who would blush everytime I had to speak to a stranger

Then someone made the mistake of taking me to a football match I'm not sure what happened - but I discovered my inner voice!!!! and I haven't looked back since

Seriously, I'm quite shy with strangers, but my job means I have to mix with clients quite a lot and you learn how to strike up a conversation about nothing in particular and, by listening, end up talking about something you both have in common. For me that usually means cars or football!
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Re: Small talk

The last two posts pretty much sum up my take on the topic. If I'm working, I can turn it on and chat up anybody for anything. When I'm not working I'm much more quiet and reserved. There are times while I'm just socializing that I have to remind myself that I do have skills and I should use them.
--Toronto
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Re: Small talk

Quote:
Originally Posted by Roswell
Usually I can walk up to someone and strike up a conversation without much of a problem. Unless that person is Bazza.
Well, let's face it, who'd want to talk to him?
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Boring Re: Small talk

Quote:
Originally Posted by bazza
Also, sometimes I 'go on a bit', and other peoples eyes start to glaze over...
Really?
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Re: Small talk

Quote:
Originally Posted by bazza
Well, let's face it, who'd want to talk to him?
You do know what I'm getting at don't you?
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Wave Re: Small talk

Quote:
Originally Posted by Roswell
You do know what I'm getting at don't you?
The fact that we (a bunch of friendly, open, approachable people) were completely ignored by your goodself on a fine sunny Yorkshire afternoon? No, completely forgotten about that.

Last edited by RicksAlfas; 01-12-05 at 20:01.
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Re: Small talk

Bugger!
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Re: Small talk

Quote:
Originally Posted by RicksAlfas
The fact that we (a bunch of friendly, open, approachable people) were completely ignored by your goodself on a fine sunny Yorkshire afternoon? No, completely forgotten about that.


did he really do that.......the ignorant fecker

i can imagine him doing that though as everytime i drive past him(we live in the same town) and flash lights and wave....he completely ignores me
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Re: Small talk

Quote:
Originally Posted by Roswell
You do know what I'm getting at don't you?
As if I could forget the heartache
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Re: Small talk

Next time I'll come straight over and give you a big guy hug.
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Re: Small talk

Nice poll GC

Since we are talking IRL situations with strangers, I would have to say that I'm the shy type too. Which doesn't mean meek but more like reserved of opinion and I don't need to be the centre of attention. Prefer to observe, listen and contribute where I feel appropriate. Actually, in some respects, that also goes for company I'm well acquainted with However, as some people here have said to me over online chat and otherwise, people may appear different on forums to that which they are IRL. It's interesting reading this, as it confirms it for me

Fascinating

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Re: Small talk

I am normally not accepted well at functions, someting to do with blue fur
 
(Post Link) post #23 of 47 Old 02-12-05 Thread Starter
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Re: Small talk

Quote:
Originally Posted by Toronto Spider
...... If I'm working, I can turn it on and chat up anybody for anything. When I'm not working I'm much more quiet and reserved.....

I know exactly what you mean, Tor.


In a work situation, I tend to feel much more confident and can converse with colleagues and clients with ease. However, it is a totally different story in a social situation.


Maybe it is because, in a work situation, the rules of etiquette are so much more defined and the topic of conversation will always start with something work related (i.e. something about which both parties should know well, and already have in common).


Also, at work, you do not have to reveal yourself at all. You can hide behind a professional image.
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Re: Small talk

Quote:
Originally Posted by kurzon
Nice poll GC
Cheers!



Quote:
Originally Posted by kurzon
...... However, as some people here have said to me over online chat and otherwise, people may appear different on forums to that which they are IRL. It's interesting reading this, as it confirms it for me

Fascinating
I have to admit, this is one of the interesting aspects of this poll for me.

You get an image of what someone is like, based purely on their postings. However, what better way of hiding is there than behind the anonymity of an Internet alias?

Obviously, some people (myself included) can feel more relaxed about conversing and even revealing aspects of themselves on-line that they would never dream of doing IRL.

There are a couple of people who have said that they are shy in social situations that I would never have guessed from the style of their forum posts.

(That doesn't include you, Mr.O )
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Re: Small talk

Quote:
Originally Posted by Green Cloverleaf
(That doesn't include you, Mr.O )

you have met me Gc and you know that i am the shy and reserved type irl.....
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