OK. I can accept that clothes need to have labels inside, if only for the care instructions (even if I do just bung everything in a mixed wash and hope for the best personally).
But it's hard to beleive that the combination of factors which make them THE MOST IRRITATING THING IN THE WORLD are entirely accidental. Is this a cosmic joke?
Where should we place the label? Oh - back of the neck. Or just above the crack. Anywhere that's particularly sensitive and ticklish basically. And so that if it's turned out it's obvious to other people, but completely undetectable to you.
What should we make it of? Some other material than the clothes of course. Something that's rougher. And make sure the shape has raw edges and sharp corners. Preferably the material should also be particularly cold to the touch when you put on the clothes on a winter morning.
But we should make it easy to remove in case the owner would prefer their clothes to not make it look like they've got lice?
It should specifically be designed so that if you try to remove it, it tears the garment to shreds! Make sure that the stitching holding the label is also the stitching which joins a seam!
Also, train my wife to give a really withering look when I have to sheepishly admit to having ripped the seam of another item of clothing because the label was itching.
"Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so." - Douglas Adams
"You know, sometimes the world seems like a pretty mean place."
"That's why animals are so soft and huggy."
- Calvin and Hobbes
To err is human, to moderate ursine.