BBQ Rules

We are about to enter the BBQ season.

Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity.

When a man volunteers to do the BBQ, the following chain of events are put into motion:

1) The woman buys the food.
2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables and makes dessert.
3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces and takes it to the man who is lounging by the BBQ - beer in hand.
4) The woman remains outside the compulsory 2metre exlusion zone where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding activities can take place without the interference of the women.

Here come the important part...
5) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE BBQ

More routine...
6) The woman goes inside to organize plates and cutlery.
7) The woman comes out to tell the man the meat is looking great. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he flips the meat.

Important again...
8.) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.

More routine....
9) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces and brings them to the table.
10) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.

And most important of all:
11) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
12) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed her 'night off.'

And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women....

My wife agrees with you.

Sounds about right. You women are so ungrateful...

My wife can be so ungrateful; Do you know what she said '' This steak is a bit underdone'' i'd been slaving for hours over the hot bbq

amen to all that

my barbies involve nothing other than meat and fire. if mrs al decides to introduce some vegetables to proceedings then that's up to her, nowt to do with me

So very true

I am in total agreement.

Making me hungry

On the subject of BBQ's - does owning a gas barbeque make someone less of a man

Originally Posted by Lookin' 4 Ferdi

On the subject of BBQ's - does owning a gas barbeque make someone less of a man

yes, gas is for girls

On the subject of BBQ's - does owning a gas barbeque make someone less of a man
yes, gas is for girls

Yup - can't beat the flavour of meat properly grilled over charcoal, possibly with some wood chippings added for extra flavour

Originally Posted by Lookin' 4 Ferdi

On the subject of BBQ's - does owning a gas barbeque make someone less of a man

I'm amazed you need to ask Flerbs..

1 - How on earth do you expect to under/over cook on gas when it's controllable. The whole idea of a bbq is the uncertainty of the heat.
2 - How do you inject the taste of parafin from the fire lighters into the meat if you use gas?
3 - The whole idea is that you get back in touch with your hunter/gatherer primitive side. Did our cave men ancestors have a gas bbq - no they most certainly did not. If god had intended for us to use gas bbq's then why did he invent fire
4 - Finally - given your location I dont think you should have bottled gas - its dangerous - likewise you've probably got enough heat down their to singe the odd sausage

Thank you for your prompt and forthright responses... its not Me that has the gas abomination you understand no-sir-ee.... I'm asking on behalf of my...um....Friend.....who, it is quite obvious to me now, is a manby-pamby as he let his wife talk him into purchasing such a stooopid device *nervous laugh* hahahahah ha

can you imaging such a thing.... why I would imaging he would now struggle to hold his head high in public and will probably loose what little respect he had on the forum.....um I mean from his friends....

Seeing as a decent steak only takes about 8 minutes to cook properly, the instant on-and-offability of gas saves on a lot of wasted heat...

Don't know about the UK,in South Africa men do the braai(barbecue).Over here in Portugal I am lost,women do ALL the cooking.Whenever I pull out the trusty Weber barbecue,my mother-in-law frowns and chases me away to go and watch TV(I love her to bits)

Originally Posted by Lookin' 4 Ferdi

Thank you for your prompt and forthright responses... its not Me that has the gas abomination you understand no-sir-ee.... I'm asking on behalf of my...um....Friend.....who, it is quite obvious to me now, is a manby-pamby as he let his wife talk him into purchasing such a stooopid device *nervous laugh* hahahahah ha

haha, a friend of mine asked me yesterday to speak to a guy i work with (who's a bit of an IT wizzard) about how to clear all sorts of naughty history off her computer. in other words she wanted me to speak to the IT guy and say 'a friend of mine needs to clear bla bla bla'. needless to say i told her to bugger off

I bought a gas BBQ a year or so back, thinking that we'd use it more because it's so easy to set up and get started.
But it's all a lie!
Yes, you can start cooking sooner, but the 5 minutes saved not waiting for th coals to heat pales into insignificance when you compare it to the huge amount of time you then have to spend cleaning the damn thing.
With a proper BBQ, you wait for the ashes to cool, then you chuck them away. All the food grease has fallen on to them, so that's pretty much it.
With a gas one, you have to spend hours wiping fat and burnt food deposits off the bottom and the burners.

BBQs suck

Originally Posted by bazza

With a gas one, you have to spend hours wiping fat and burnt food deposits off the bottom and the burners.

Do you